Episode #167
Ep. 167 When Marriage Becomes a To-Do List: Finding Your Way Back to Each Other with Katie Doles
When Marriage Becomes a To-Do List: Finding Your Way Back to Each Other What happens when you're great at managing everything in your life, but that same drive for control starts showing up in your marriage? In this episode of The Beauty In The Mess , I sit down with Katie Doles, Marriage Strategist and founder of Rooted Wife Coaching . We talk about something many driven women may recognize: taking charge, doing everything ourselves, and then becoming frustrated when our husbands step back. Katie and I explore control, resentment, communication, intimacy, date nights, overscheduled lives, community, and creating a home that feels like a sanctuary rather than another source of stress. Faith is also central to our conversation as Katie shares how her relationship with Jesus shapes her views on marriage, grace, forgiveness, boundaries, and loving someone imperfectly. 2:30 – Meet Katie and her path to marriage coaching 5:30 – What she looked for in a husband—and herself 6:30 – Faith, marriage, and covenant 8:30 – Problem-solving and relationship patterns 10:30 – Turning off “work mode” at home 12:30 – When taking charge becomes managing your husband 13:30 – She steps up, he steps back—and resentment grows 16:30 – Why changing the dynamic takes more than a conversation 17:30 – Letting go of control so your spouse can step up 19:30 – Letting your husband do things his way 21:30 – Can a marriage recover from resentment? 22:30 – Marriage coaching vs. therapy 24:30 – The “roommate/business partner” phase 25:30 – “If everything's a priority, nothing's a priority” 27:30 – Overscheduled kids and families 30:30 – Why your spouse can't meet every social need 32:30 – “Fika,” friendship, and meaningful connection 34:30 – Making the first move in friendship 37:30 – Why date nights matter 39:30 – Emotional, spiritual, and physical intimacy 41:30 – Withholding what your spouse needs 43:30 – Creating a home sanctuary 45:30 – The impossible standards we set for ourselves 47:30 – Faith, forgiveness, kindness, and grace 49:30 – Boundaries and unconditional love 52:30 – What does a beautiful marriage look like? 53:30 – “Daily sleepovers with your best friend” 55:30 – Disagreeing without disrespect 56:30 – Rooted Wife Coaching and Cultivating a Beautiful Marriage 58:30 – Why proactive work matters ✨ Connect with Katie Doles • Rooted Wife Coaching • Facebook • Instagram • YouTube ✨ Connect with Michele Simms • Website: The Beauty In The Mess • Instagram: @the.beauty.in.the.mess • LinkedIn: Michele Simms • Facebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Podcast Rate & Review If this episode spoke to you, please consider leaving a 5-star review and sharing it with someone who could use a little encouragement in their marriage. #KatieDoles #RootedWifeCoaching #TheBeautyInTheMess #Marriage #ChristianMarriage #Relationships #MarriageAdvice #FaithAndMarriage Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
