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How well can we really know ourselves if we’re only willing to rely on our own perspective? We all have blind spots—not because we lack self-awareness, but because there are things we simply can’t see from where we’re...

Some losses don’t come with a funeral. Sometimes we’re grieving what didn’t happen—the nurturing we didn’t receive, the childhood there wasn’t room to have, or the adults who couldn’t be adults. We can build something...

In this episode, we explore three relational skills that often get confused: Validation says, “If I am you—with your history, family of origin, and the meaning this held for you—I understand how you got there.”...

For a lot of people, those are surprisingly difficult questions to answer. Sometimes we genuinely don't know. Sometimes we know, but we've learned to keep parts of ourselves private. Sometimes we've gotten very good at...

There's a moment almost everyone knows: someone says something, and before you've even processed it, you're already deciding not to react. You smile. You let it go. And somewhere in that quiet moment, you might be...

Your "difficult" child might just be determined. Your "too much" might just be someone who hasn't finished growing into her enthusiasm yet. In this episode, I talk about the difference between adaptation and...

The deepest injury of narcissistic neglect isn't what happened to you. It's what never consistently happened for you. Nobody wondering what you were thinking. Nobody asking what you felt. Nobody staying curious about...

In this episode, Rachel joins Jackie as they dive into the intricacies of early recovery in therapy. In this episode, they discuss the foundational stages of addiction recovery, focusing on the challenges faced by...

That question has been on my mind after two clients asked me to record this episode. For some of us, touch meant comfort and safety. For others, it meant obligation, manipulation, or even fear. Some of us grew up in...

Changing your patterns doesn't just change you. It changes the relationships around you. One of the biggest surprises in healing is that being healthier doesn't always feel better, at least not at first. The people...

You can understand your pattern completely. You can know exactly where it came from, what it's protecting you from, why it shows up the way it does. And still, in the moment, you do the thing anyway. That's because...

Understanding your patterns is one thing. Interrupting them in real time is something else entirely. In this episode, we talk about the tiny space between the trigger and the reaction — and how to find it, use it, and...

Why can you understand your behaviors and still repeat them: You can explain exactly why you do it. And then you do it again. That's not a character flaw. It's the difference between insight and integration, and they...

I said that in a men's group a few years ago — and the room went silent. Everyone immediately understood what it meant to organize your life around being needed. What surprised me was what came next: when I introduced...

"All behavior makes sense. And if it doesn't make sense yet — we keep asking questions until it does." This is one of the phrases I say most in my work, and in this episode I'm unpacking where it actually came from. Not...