On Attachment

Join relationship coach Stephanie Rigg in On Attachment, where she delves deep into all things attachment theory, love, relationships & intimacy - sharing her wisdom and experience to help you start making real changes in your life & relationships.

On Attachment is a society podcast hosted by Stephanie Rigg, with 249 episodes on record and a Required Pod Score of 80.

Stephanie Rigg hosts On Attachment, a society show with 249 episodes published.

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  Episode #283

  #283: From Self-Abandonment to Self-Worth (Plus TWO Exciting Announcements!)

  Oct 1, 202637 minS1

  Pre-order my book, The Secure Self In today's episode, we're talking about self-abandonment and what it really takes to shift away from these well-worn patterns into a more secure version of ourselves that is grounded in self-worth. We discuss why self-abandonment feels so natural to many of us with anxious attachment patterns, the importance of self-compassion, building nervous system capacity, advocating for our needs from a steady place, and building self-trust. My book, The Secure Self, is now available for pre-order! Head to stephanierigg.com/book to claim your exclusive bonus package for free as a pre-order gift with purchase.

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  Episode #282

  #282: How to Forgive Yourself for Pushing Someone Away (Ask Steph)

  Sep 22, 202611 minS1

  In today's Ask Steph episode, I'm giving advice to a listener who is feeling a lot of shame and self-blame for their role in the breakdown of a relationship, which they've come to recognise after working on themselves post-break-up. I share some thoughts on why shame and blame can be so tempting, but also how it blocks us from truly learning the lessons of our break-up and changing our patterns going forward. I also offer some honest advice on whether it's a good idea to reach out to your ex to share what you've learned about yourself since the break-up.

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  Episode #281

  #281: When You Want to Work on the Relationship But Your Partner Doesn't

  Sep 17, 202622 minS1

  So many people will know the frustration of wanting to work on your relationship and being met with resistance, shutdown, or disengagement from a partner. When your sincere attempts at getting through and finding a path forward aren't landing, it's easy to feel hopeless—and confused as to what it means for your future. In today's episode, I'm sharing some thoughts on this predicament, as well as tips for breaking through the impasse and how you can find your way back to centre irrespective of whether your partner comes to the table. Links Free resources for anxious attachment Free masterclass on breaking the anxious-avoidant cycle

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  Episode #280

  #280: Why You Feel Jealous About Your Partner's Past (& How to Navigate It)

  Sep 8, 202615 minS1

  In today's episode, we're talking about retroactive jealousy — being an excessive preoccupation with a partner's romantic and/or sexual history, and feelings of intense insecurity and comparison as a result. This is a really common experience (one I used to struggle with myself!), particularly among those with anxious attachment patterns who already experience a hypervigilance to perceived relational threats coupled with low self-esteem and a fear of abandonment. We'll talk about how retroactive jealousy is often a branch off the "unworthiness" tree, and why starting there — with tending to our low self-worth — is often the fix. Links Free resources for healing anxious attachment Follow me on Instagram Subscribe to my YouTube channel

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  Episode #279

  #279: When an Old Love Resurfaces and Starts Pulling Away (Ask Steph)

  Sep 1, 202614 minS1

  This week's Ask Steph question comes from a 77 year old listener who recently reconnected with a man she loved 45 years ago, following the passing of her husband of 40 years. He was the one who got away, and their reunion felt like everything she'd hoped for... until he suddenly started pulling back without explanation. In offering my advice, I share some thoughts on why a first relationship after a long marriage can feel so consuming, why avoidant patterns often show up most acutely when someone is going through something difficult, and why the instinct to chase and accommodate someone who's withdrawing usually costs us more than it helps. We talk about the difference between having compassion for someone's fear and abandoning your own needs to manage it, and why getting clear on what you actually want (before you have the conversation with them) matters so much. If you've ever found yourself dropping your own needs to keep someone from leaving, this one's for you. Have a question you'd like to submit for a future Ask Steph episode? Click here to leave a voice note. Links Free resources for healing anxious attachment Visit my website Follow me on Substack

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