
Breaking Dawn: Chs. 10-14
Jacob heads to the Cullens to murder them all. He fails so completely at killing them that he ends up protecting them from his own former packmates. Meanwhile Bella is having one of those pregnancy cravings, but for huma

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We're reading the Southern Vampire Mysteries by Charlaine Harris and podcasting about it! We'll recap as we go, so you can read along or just listen along. Join us!
Unknown Host hosts Living Dead in Austin.

Jacob heads to the Cullens to murder them all. He fails so completely at killing them that he ends up protecting them from his own former packmates. Meanwhile Bella is having one of those pregnancy cravings, but for huma

This movie is better! Better than the other movies, better than the book. The vampires finally start doing some vampire stuff. Except for Riley, the middle-management vampire. Sucks to be him. ★ Support this podcast on P

Bella, Edward, and Jacob wrap up their frozen tent three-way (which turned out to be more of a no-way). Then, to battle! The Cullens and the Quileutes join battle with the baby vampire army, and destroy them handily. Vic

Bella gets engaged to Edward. She's pretty unhappy about it, but that doesn't seem to matter to Edward. Then they're off to the wilderness as bait for the attacking baby-vampires. Bella immediately begins to freeze in th

Bella graduates from high school. She's impatient to get to the next phase of her life: death. But there is still a lot of living to suffer through. Jacob and his pack agree to team up with the Cullens to fight the newde

Bella hangs out with Jacob and the Quileutes and learns some of their ancient (but plot-relevant) history. Then she hangs out with Jasper and learns his ancient (but plot-relevant) history. Based on Jasper's experience,

Bella learns the rules of werwolvery from Jacob. The rules range from odd (they don't age) to repulsive (sometimes they form a unbreakable romantic bond with a toddler). Edward is even more controlling than usual, but af

Bellas life returns to normal. Unfortunately for her, normal is not very good. I don't know who needs to hear this, but if your hundred-year-old vampire boyfriend is trying to isolate you from your oft-shirtless werewolf

We watched New Moon: The Movie! I guess I didn't realize, when reading the novel, just how many jorts were present. It's hard to ignore the jorts when they're on the big screen. Also, there's a bunch of drama about Edwar

Bella goes to Italy to meet some cool vampires. None of them say "Ciao, Bella." They live in a combination sewer/office building/watchtower, and they collect special vampires like Edward. They don't get him this time, bu

Bella's second-favorite vampire returns, and she needs Bella's help. They must hurry to Italy to prevent Edward from exposing himself to tourists. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★ We are Alice Sullivan , Micah Sparkma

Bella discovers Jacob's furry secret. Then she throws herself off a cliff. Those things aren't connected, Bella just thought that would be a fun thing to do. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★ We are Alice Sullivan , Mi

Bella puts her best moves on Jacob. That means she nearly dies and he has to save her life. After that he starts avoiding her, and she comes to the only reasonable conclusion: he has joined a cult. ★ Support this podcast

Bella is despondent over her loss of Edward. She seems like she'll never be happy again, but then she encounters the combined effect of Motorcycles and Another Hot Guy. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★ (00:14) - Intro

Bella and Edward are still madly in love, but a tragic paper cut incident at Bella's 18th birthday party tears them apart, presumably forever. Bella is very sad, and spends 4 months thinking about how sad she is. ★ Suppo

We watched the Twilight movie! Sparkly sexless vampires in the Pacific Northwest. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★ (00:14) - Intro (00:25) - Review (14:03) - Outro We are Alice Sullivan , Micah Sparkman, and Jeff Lake

Bella is rescued from having to watch her boyfriend's pickup baseball game by having a killer vampire start hunting her. She flees back to Phoenix with Edward's family, but even they can't protect her from the biggest th

Edward and Bella find some private time so he can show her his sparkle. Then she meets his family, in their bathroom-less, bedroom-less house. Then, for some reason, baseball. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★ (00:13)

In Port Angeles, Bella finds trouble but is saved by Edward. Romance blooms. Edward is worried about the extreme danger he poses to Bella, but he soon discovers that there is no level of danger that is too extreme for Be

That's right, we're reading the sexiest of sexless vampire books: Twilight! High-schooler Bella Swan arrives in gloomy Forks, WA. She doesn't like what she finds there, with the exception of the beautiful Edward Cullen,
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