Episode #23
Grief, Healing, and Inner Fabulosity: The Art of Taking Your Time with Ally Dalsimer
"Don't let people bully you about your grief. You take as much time as you need." —Ally Dalsimer Inner fabulosity — the idea that you're worthy and whole even on the days you can barely tread water — is the heart of this conversation with award-winning author and speaker Ally Dalsimer. Ally lost her husband to cancer eleven years ago, and in this episode, she walks through what actually happened after: the job loss, a failed run for Congress, caring for a dying mother, and the morning she realized no one needed her to get out of bed. This episode is for anyone grieving a spouse, parent, or child, and for anyone who's been told — directly or not — that they should be "over it" by now. Ally is candid about how long healing took her, how she helped her two kids process losing their father, and how she eventually rebuilt a life around writing, speaking, and a philosophy she calls inner fabulosity. Key takeaways: • Grief has no universal timeline — it took Ally almost ten years before she could speak about her husband without crying, and she insists that's neither too long nor too short. • Kids process loss differently than adults because they lack the cognitive tools to name what they're feeling, so patience matters more than explanations. • Trying to "solve" a grieving person's pain often backfires; listening without offering solutions is usually the more supportive move. • Small, repeatable actions — Ally's rule was doing just three things a day — can rebuild a sense of purpose faster than waiting to "feel ready." • Telling someone their grief has an expiration date is one of the most damaging things you can say to a person in mourning. • Running for public office, even in a losing campaign, gave Ally proof that she was capable of far more than she believed. Listen to the full conversation and subscribe to Live, Love, Survive, Thrive for more real stories on healing, resilience, and rediscovering purpose after loss. Connect with Dr. Kimberly: Website LinkedIn Instagram Facebook YouTube Pinterest Apple Podcast Spotify Episode Highlights: 04:07 Meet Ally Dalsimer 06:03 What "Inner Fabulosity" Really Means 08:16 Losing Her Husband: The Full Grief Story 15:02 Helping Her Kids Grieve Without Fixing Them 21:12 Grief as a Child vs. Grief as an Adult 24:20 Running for Congress While Grieving 27:20 Advice for Someone New to Grief 40:31 Where to Find Ally and Her Podcast 40:50 Ally's Favorite Plant-Based Recipe Resources: Get Ally's Book It's Okay Not to be Fabulous Every Day: A Journey to Self-Discovery Get Kim's Books Grid: Once in a Lifetime You Get to Start Over Live, Love, Survive, Thrive! Thank you for listening. To keep my podcast alive, Wanna buy my dog Dakota a bone? ☕️ https://buymeacoffee.com/livelovesurvivethrive
