Found at 40
You’re Not Bad at Habits. You’re Just Busy Doing Everything. ✨ft. Monica Packer✨
If you’ve ever wondered why you can be incredibly responsible for everyone else and still struggle to make your own habits stick, this episode is for you. Monica Packer, author of Sticky Habits and host of About Progress , joins Chrissi to unpack why traditional habit advice often misses the realities of women’s lives, especially invisible labor, mental load, low energy, and unpredictable schedules. They talk about building habits with more flexibility, creating realistic baseline goals, and designing routines that actually support you instead of making you feel like you’re constantly failing. This is a practical, encouraging conversation about consistency, self-trust, and making progress in real life—not productivity-influencer life. (0:00) ️ Why your planner, habit tracker, and “fresh start Monday” keep betraying you The real reason so many well-intentioned habits fall apart before they ever get traction. (3:30) Why women may need to approach habit formation differently Monica explains the gap she noticed in mainstream self-help and productivity advice. (5:30) The problem with all-or-nothing self-improvement How perfectionism can turn personal growth into something exhausting instead of supportive. (8:00) Invisible labor, mental load, and why they matter for habits The unseen responsibilities that quietly drain time, energy, and predictability. (10:00) The “bro self-help” version of consistency Why “just be consistent” can sound simple in theory but fall apart in real life. (12:30) ✅ A new definition of consistency that doesn’t require perfection Monica shares a more realistic way to think about showing up over time. (15:00) Why flexibility may actually make you more consistent The mindset shift that changes what “success” looks like when life gets chaotic. (16:00) What a baseline habit is—and why it works How to create the smallest version of a habit that still counts, even on a terrible day. (19:30) What habits have to do with identity and self-trust Why following through in small ways can change how you see yourself. (21:00) What if your problem isn’t discipline—but energy? A better way to think about willpower, emotional labor, and the constant drain on your internal battery. (24:00) How to find the “sweet spot” for a habit Monica breaks down how to choose habits that are supportive, small, simple, and specific. (27:00) The When-Then-After method for making habits stick A practical habit-stacking formula designed to work with the rhythms you already have. (32:00) ️ What to do when a habit still isn’t working How to troubleshoot your habit plan without automatically deciding you’re the problem. (35:00) Why failure is part of habit formation—not proof you can’t change Monica explains how perfection can sabotage consistency and why curiosity works better than self-blame. (38:00) ✨ The bigger goal The conversation closes with what Monica hopes women begin to believe about themselves after rethinking habits. Follow Monica and the About Progress podcast on Instagram at @aboutprogress Order your copy of Sticky Habits here ! ✨ Hit follow, send this episode to your group chat, and leave a glowing review Check out @foundat40podcast on Instagram for extras, outtakes, and mild oversharing ️ Listen on Apple Podcasts and Spotify Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Foundat40
