Family Brand: Take Back Your Family
262. How to Build a Beautiful Family After Divorce with Wayde Elliott
Hey there, Family Brand OGs and newcomers alike! This week, we're joined by our friend Wayde Elliott, who we had the privilege of meeting this summer while cruising through Croatia with our families. We got to know Wayde and his daughter, Avery, on that trip, and some of the conversations we had together made us realize he had a perspective we haven't shared enough of here on the Family Brand Podcast: what does it look like to intentionally build a strong family when your family doesn't necessarily look the way you once imagined it would? Wayde's story has included some massive changes. After 20 successful years as a dentist, a spinal fusion surgery suddenly took him out of dentistry at nearly the same time he was going through a divorce. He eventually reinvented himself professionally through self-storage and real estate development, but in this conversation, we really wanted to talk about what was happening at home. When Wayde realized his marriage was ending, he made a conscious decision that the divorce didn't have to become destructive. Instead of approaching it from a place of winning or losing, he asked his ex-wife what she wanted and committed to creating the best possible outcome for her, himself, and most importantly, their kids. That decision wasn't always easy, but more than a decade later, Wayde says they still have a good relationship and have been able to remain flexible and supportive as co-parents. We also get into the parts of co-parenting that aren't so simple. What happens when you and your ex have completely different ideas about parenting? How do you respond when a decision in the other household undermines something you're trying to teach in yours? Wayde shares why he's learned to create space before reacting and to pay attention to the meaning he's assigning to an experience. We also talk about the difference between living in what Wayde calls a "suffering state" versus a "beautiful state," and why he's committed to continually becoming a better version of himself. That leads us into one of our favorite parts of the conversation: personal and family core values. Wayde shares his own values—love, learning, abundance, fitness, family, and contribution—and how he uses them as an alignment filter for his life. But maybe the most powerful moment of this episode happened before we ever hit record. During our time together in Croatia, Wayde and Avery had a conversation that changed the way he thought about showing up as her dad. Like a lot of entrepreneurs, Wayde is wired to solve problems—but Avery didn't need him to solve hers. She needed her dad to listen. She told him she wanted more one-on-one time with him, and instead of immediately trying to fix the situation, Wayde sat with her and listened. Since coming home, he's intentionally created more time that's just for the two of them. It's such a simple reminder, but one we all need: sometimes the people we love don't need our solutions. They need our presence. Hit play to hear the full conversation with Wayde! We talk about divorce, co-parenting, fatherhood, ego, forgiveness, personal growth, core values, and what it can look like to choose a beautiful family life even when the original plan changes. P.S. We're here to help you build your own Family Brand, one episode at a time. So go ahead, hit play, and let's grow together! Or, if you are ready to dive into our community, follow the links below! LINKS: All Links Family Brand! stan.store/familybrand familybrand.com/quiz familybrand.com/retreats . Links For This Episode: https://www.instagram.com/waydeelliottdmd?igsh=MTc0emRjMDBxcG1mZA%3D%3D https://www.linkedin.com/in/waydeelliottdmd Episode Minute By Minute: 00:00 Meet Wayde Elliott 01:00 Why Wayde Chose the Family Trip to Croatia 02:00 Losing His Career While Going Through Divorce 03:00 From Dentistry to a Completely New Career 04:18 Choosing an Intentional Divorce 05:00 Asking, "What Does Success Look Like?" 07:00 Creating a Win-Win for the Entire Family 08:00 Preserving a Relationship With Your Ex 09:00 Why Communication Matters in Co-Parenting 10:00 Parenting Differently in Two Households 12:00 The Meaning You Give an Experience 13:00 Love and Forgiveness Over Criticism 14:00 Deciding What Your Family Will Look Like 15:00 Interested vs. Committed 17:00 Why Ego Can Destroy Relationships 18:00 Responding Instead of Reacting 19:00 Living in a "Beautiful State" 20:00 Wayde's Personal Core Values 22:00 The Conversation With His Daughter That Changed Him 24:00 Your Kids Don't Always Need You to Fix It 26:00 Staying Present With Your Kids After Divorce 28:00 Wayde's Advice for Parents Going Through Divorce 30:00 Choosing the Meaning You Give Hard Experiences
